A Thankful Heart

It is that time of year when we start to look around and see and say what we are thankful for. I have been trying to do this challenge on Facebook this month, naming something everyday that I am thankful for. I have done this the past 2 years. The idea is to name something deep, like not just skim the surface and give a Sunday school answer. But to really look and find all the things you are thankful for. I love reading others too, I think it is a wonderful thing that so many people can find 31 things to be thankful for.

This year this task has been especially hard for me. My husband has been ill for the whole month. This illness just came on all of a sudden, and the doctors don't even know what's going on. In my opinion they are not trying hard enough. Sometimes I feel like healthcare professionals don't really care about people or helping them. I mean really, they don't know what's wrong with my husband so they throw him into physical therapy, it's their answer to everything! So as I have been thinking about this on the days I remember, it takes me awhile to really find something to be thankful for. I mean I would love to be like others and be like I am thankful for health, hmm.. or I am thankful for jobs, because let's be honest, my husbands job is probably on the line as he hasn't been to work in a month! I mean don;t get e wrong I do have things to be thankful for, I have a roof over my head, I have my son, my husband, and we are so far ok financially, and our friends have been so amazing during this time, and I have never felt so loved by a church before in my life. People really are like Jesus, its pretty amazing. I am just saying that I hear you all you people that find it hard to find things to be thankful for every year, it is really hard to see the blessings through all the fog.

I read this in my devotional tonight and it sparked me to thinking about it and it really hit home for me.

"As you sit quietly in y presence, let me fill your heart and mind with Thankfulness. This is the most direct way to achieve a thankful stance. If your mind needs a focal point, gaze at My Love poured out for you on the cross. Remember that nothing in heaven or on earth can separate you from that Love. This remembrance builds a foundation of gratitude in you, a foundation that circumstances cannot shake.
As you go through this day, look  for tiny treasures strategically placed along the way. I lovingly go before you and plant little pleasures to brighten your day. look carefully for them, and pluck them one by one. When you reach the end of the day, you will have gathered a lovely bouquet. Offer it up to Me with a grateful heart. receive My Peace as you lie down to sleep, with thankful thoughts plating a lullaby in your mind."


To me this was just what I needed. I read it as I was lying in bed and crying because at the end of the day I am exhausted and it takes such a huge toll on you to see your husband ill everyday. Even though yes he is so much better than he was in week one and two, it still breaks my heart to see him struggle with simple things, and to have him do things that are not like him, and it just kills me when we tell our son that we are going to go to the store and he says "but mommy we can't take daddy cause he will fall!" Breaks my heart. I have tried so hard to be super strong through all of this and accept this and find the thanksgiving in this situation, I just sometimes feel like crying, because, its frustrating and honestly I feel alone and very helpless.

So my goal is o find the tiny treasures to be thankful for.... and I encourage you to do this as well.